food for thought – Page 6 – The Boring Old Man

Frugal, not cheap.

I’m a firm believer in the old adage “you get what you pay for”. Now, this isn’t ALWAYS true, but in my experience, it is the case more often than not.

Since I grew up “lower middle class” and spent the bulk of my adulthood in the ranks of the “working poor”, I’ve always been cognizant of every dollar that leaves my wallet. But at the same time, somehow I ended up with expensive taste and a predisposition toward high end goods. And by “high end” I do not mean “designer labels” or “luxury”, I am far more impressed with quality of materials, construction and yes, design. Esthetics matter, to me at least.

I learned at a young age that my meager dollars went a lot further by buying everything I could used. Pretty much everything of value I had as a kid and young adult, was “pre-owned”. (I still laugh at that term, sometime in the 90’s, the genuis marketing folks decided “pre-owned” didn’t have the same preconceptions as “used”. Semantics. Silliness. But I digress… ) All my bikes and sports gear and musical instruments were used before I got them. My first few cars were hand-me-downs or used. And you know what? All of that stuff worked just as well as it would have if I’d paid double and bought new. The thing is, if new were my only option, I would have had to simply do without.

I also spent time, as a young adult, living on my own starting at 19, shopping the discount stores, flea markets and other such “cheap” routes. This is the time in my life where I learned the difference between inexpensive and “cheap”. No matter how good it looks at first, no matter what kind of great deal you scored, “cheap” is not worth the cost, no matter how little it is.

For example, I used to buy socks at the flea market. There was a vendor there that sold new socks at something like $20 for a dozen pair. Screaming deal, right? On the face of it, sure. But by the 3rd wash, they had elastic popping and were getting thin. Within a few months they would be unbearable. It was like wearing sandpaper in your shoes, really terribly uncomfortable. And when you work on your feet 8-10 hours a day, uncomfortable feet turn into painful feet, which is positively miserable.

Another example is sunglasses. I used to buy whatever cheap sunglasses I saw that I liked and inevitably they would either get a scratched lens or the frame would break. I have absurdly sensitive eyes and wear sunglasses virtually year round, whenever I’m outside. I’m practically blind without them in daylight. So as a consequence I was buying maybe half a dozen pairs of sunglasses a year.

Now those two examples are both things that have plentiful options in every conceivable price range but are also things that I use every. single. day.

When online shopping became a thing, I found some inexpensive wool socks that cost a little over double the amount of the flea market socks, and it’s like the light bulb above my head burst into light! Yes, I paid double but they lasted a year – 4X the longevity of the cheap socks. And the remained pretty comfortable that whole time, which literally improved my quality of life, spending so much time on my feet.

Too many people just look at the price tag. Others only care about what other people will think. Me? I ask, how long will it last, how comfortable will it be and do I like the way it looks? Let’s face it, no matter how good the deal and how good the product – if you think it’s ugly, you aren’t going to wear it, so every penny you did spend is wasted.

With things going completely sideways here in the US, and inflation slapping you in the face at every turn, it’s more important than ever to start getting frugal, if you aren’t already.

Clothing, tools, cookware, shoes and such are things that have nearly unlimited options in price-range, but the markets are flooded with cheap garbage. Be wary of anything that appears to be too good a deal, chances are there is a reason why something is being sold at a deep discount.

And while it does appear to be true that “they don’t make ’em like they used to”, quality is still out there, you just need to wade through a lot more garbage before you find it.

And I know it’s now trendy to shop for clothes at Goodwill and Salvation Army stores (hipster nonsense), but there are still good deals to be found there on things like books and CDs, housewares and things of that nature. Is it overpriced versus a few decades ago? Absolutely it is, but its still a better deal than off Amazon or from your typical retail outlet.

With the cost of living shooting for the stars and wages stagnating at best, every dollar saved is a good thing.

Be smart. Consider more than the price tag. Your wallet will thank you later!

Thanks for reading!

You never forget your first…

Lately I’ve been getting some traction in the quest to play with a band again, so I’ve been digging up a lot of “oldies” to listen to and prepare for auditions and such. These trips down memory lane brought up lots of recollections of past bands and gigs, and then out of the blue a song came on the radio that I hadn’t heard in a very long time… ( yes, I do still listen to the radio from time to time!)

This song was the VERY FIRST song I ever learned to play on a drumset!

Now, I was only 5 years old when this album was released, and while I started learning drum rudiments at 7, I didn’t get my first kit until I was maybe 10. So this tune was already a “classic” when I was figuring it out.

For the life of me, I could not learn the bass drum part and then by chance one afternoon I was hanging out with a friend of mine – Mike B. – at his house and he had a much older brother that was a drummer (with an amazing Ludwig kit, that put my jalopy kit to shame!). The brother was cool enough to let me sit down at his kit and he spent about half an hour teaching me that drum part.

After that day, everything just kinda clicked and I was off to the races. 4 years later I was starting my first band. Nearly 4 years after that, and a few bands later, I played my first gig at a nightclub I wasn’t even old enough to legally be in.

Forty-plus years later, hundreds of songs later,I STILL remember the first song I learned like it was yesterday.

It was pure serendipity. That afternoon in the finished attic space on Shady Lane in San Jose at that shiny Ludwig kit changed my life. Mike’s brother, who was close to twice my age, (and I’d never met before!) gave me a gift I could never repay.

It just goes to show, you never know what that small moment of kindness you show someone will lead to. I could never repay Mike’s brother, but I hope in my own ways I’ve paid it foreword, helping others along their path.

Just something to think about…

Thanks for reading!

What is wrong with these people?

Once upon a time, America was a truly special, unique place and Americans (for the most part) were as bold and forward thinking as they were generous and caring.

Sure, there were some ugly things in the past in this country, nobody with two brain cells to rub together is debating that fact. But that was in NO WAY unique to the USA. The world for the bulk of history has been a cruel, brutal place. That goes for the US, as much as it does for every other country and continent for all of recorded history. We were not special in that regard, not even slightly.

No, what made it special was that you could speak your mind without fear of persecution. You could go to whatever Church your soul guided you to, or not go at all. We had unalienable rights and were FREE to pursue YOUR happiness. Basically, the Government was restricted from pushing you around. This is individual freedom.

All of this is great stuff, right? Makes sense from a human perspective, that we should be able to live our lives AS WE SEE FIT, so long as we’re not infringing on others. Simple. Effective.

Then, of course, as always happens with mere humans “holding power”, they can’t help themselves but to try to attain even MORE power. This again, plagues all of recorded history, worldwide. It’s no surprise, it is to be expected.

What IS surprising, to me at least, is how the population today seems to be not only OK with what is essentially a hostile takeover of our country by government and their cronies in business, they seem to be celebrating it and chastising anyone that doesn’t want to get with their program

It’s bad enough when the Hollyweirdos and the sportsball morons weigh in on things they know nothing about, but now everyone with a smartphone and a twitter account thinks they know what is better for me than I do.

Their opinions are also good for compost piles.

What happened to our bold, proud populace to turn them into nanny-state cheerleaders? Why don’t they understand that any power to compell ME to do something against my will/wishes/conscience, can ALSO be used against THEM to compell actions they themselves are against? Those that would abuse their power generally aren’t too picky about who they wield it against.

These are certainly not new concepts, and there have been a lot of words spilled on the topic over the last few years (which is probably why it’s on my mind now) but I have yet to see any reasoning that makes sense.

There is a lot of blather about this being the result of the public ed. system. I don’t buy that. It MAY have contributed to it, especially at Universities in the last decade, but a lot of the lemmings out there went through their schooling back when schools actually taught and weren’t the so-called “indoctrination centers” they are considered by many to be these day.

While I find social media kinda gross, I don’t think that’s the cause of it either. Yes, it has certainly exacerbated some problems, but there is a certain equilibrium within social media. While I don’t engage in the “big names” like FB and IG and Twitter, I do occasionally comment on YouTube and on other blogs, so I’d consider that “social media” too. And I’ve both learned AND laughed from those outlets, so I cannot condemn social media as a whole. Though generally speaking I do believe it does more harm than good.

Is it that we’ve gone from being “the great melting pot” of society to self-segregating along racial/political lines? It seems everyone is fighting for /their/ interests, which coincidentally also happen to be the “only path to justice”, so you know, they are fighting only for altruistic, selfless goals…it’s everybody ELSE that’s wrong!

In my humble opinion, I believe a combination of factors brought us here. First, fear. And it’s a biggie. Fear of the unknown. Fear of disease/death. Fear of the Police. Fear of the thugs “protesting” by burning city blocks to the ground. Fear of your business closing or your job disappearing. Fear of a government that has proven beyond the shadow of a doubt that they do not care about their constituents, and in some cases look at their populace as the enemy. And this is all on top of the usual fears most people deal with on the day-to-day, like paying the rent/mortgage, buying groceries and keeping the house warm, in this era of crazy inflation, etc.

Second, I believe a lot of people are experiencing a profound sense of hopelessness/helplessness. And no, they AREN’T the same thing. These feelings come from fear. See above.

And third, we are completely oversaturated with “data” and “content”, but everything we see and hear has gone through some sort of spin cycle to make sure the “right narrative” is being pushed. Therefore, most of us feel like we’re being lied to, all day, every day. That insecure feeling of not knowing what’s going on helps cement that hopeless/helpless feeling.

This may sound like full on tin-foil hat, looney speak but I think that fear and hopelessness is what our “leaders” are counting on. If We the People aren’t afraid of some “threat” or there isn’t a “crisis” to be concerned with, then of what use is the Gov’t?

To be perfectly honest, I think a lot of our “problems” come from the fact that things in the US have been too good, too easy, for too long. We’ve gone soft. Way too soft. I don’t mean that as an insult, truly. I’m in the same boat. We’re too focused on how many likes we get on a post, or getting our hands on the latest iPhone. Worried that /our/ team/contestant/politician won’t win. Worries about our own personal “optics”… But nobody really seems to be concerned with getting along, being neighborly or being responsible and preparing for hard times.

We’re long overdue for a big Sping Cleaning. We need to find purpose in ourselves beyond consuming. And if we’re to survive as a nation, it’s time to start pushing back and reminding the powers-that-be that WE put them there to represent US. If they aren’t up to the job, we’ll find someone who is.

And as an aside, and I haven’t the slightest idea how this can happen, but I believe a good start is to remove full-time job status from Congress. I think is should be run like the National Guard – one weekend a month, with a month-long session every summer. If those people had to work for a living like the rest of us, we’d be in a better condition. Part B of this idea is that all members of congress are paid the median salary of their district, period. If nothing else it would give them incentive to raise the standards of living for the people they represent, not just their donors. But here I go again, off on a tangent…

In conclusion, I guess what I’m saying is it’s time to change perspective on Government. They are NOT our saviors, they are OUR EMPLOYEES. Clearly they are working overtime to get you to forget that all important fact.

Take care of yourself and those important to you, and remember that when you need them most, the Government will leave you hanging, if not make things worse for you. They are not your friends; you are nothing more than a taxable asset (and hopefully a vote) to them. That is all they see you as. The number one goal of Government is CONTROL. Over you, your finances, your health, your future well-being. That is not their job. Remember that with freedom comes responsibility, but at least when free you can determine your own course.

I realize this was me just thinking “out loud”, I wish I actually had solutions to the crazy mess we find ourselves living in. Nonetheless, thanks for reading!

Some truth, if you want it.

This essay was directed at at very particular and precise target, but this one quote, IMHO, is nearly universal to the “western” civilization.

“Our lack of self worth and submission to idolatry and ideologues is the real danger. We have always been our own greatest downfall.”

https://roycewhite.substack.com/p/an-open-letter-to-the-black-bourgeoisie?s=r

I don’t think there is anything wrong with having heroes or “idolizing” someone that excels in an area that interests you. That being said, since the advent of reality television and social media, those being put on a pedestal these days are questionable at best. What we’re NOT seeing is the “best of the best” being celebrated. Instead, it’s the loudmouth, the braggart, the sleaze-merchant that is held in high esteem by “the public”. But why? That is the question that confounds me.

Why are so many people spending so much time watching other people play video games or “unboxing” stuff? So much so that those “content creators” are amongst the highest paid on YouTube! Now, granted, I’ve never really been a video game guy, even when they were first a thing back in the late 1970’s/early 1980’s. After a few minutes I lost interest. But WATCHING someone else play? That’s as bad as watching paint dry. And yet some dude managed to earn millions of dollars by filming himself playing video games for other’s entertainment. Go figure… And don’t get me wrong, I’ve got nothing against those people that found a way to earn a living with no talent or worthwhile skills. More power to ’em. I’d rather a person earn a living like that, than say as a charlatan preacher fleecing their flock or leeching off The State.

What I really can’t wrap my head around is the appeal of this social garbage. When all you bring to the table is the ability to buy a bunch of stuff… what is there to look up to?

Everybody can use some inspiration. Myself included. But what do say, the Kardashians, inspire? Aside from “being rich”? None of them seem to be terribly happy or well-adjusted people. None of them can maintain a relationship. Other than pictures of themselves, they don’t produce anything worthwhile. And yet, they’ve become a household name and amassed tens, if not hundreds, of millions of dollars because… I’m sorry, I don’t know how to finish that sentence. I cannot answer the “because”, because it makes no damn sense.

Again, nothing against them exactly, I just don’t understand the appeal.

We, as a people, need to start holding up those of worth. Stop supporting the lowest common denominator, and search out the true innovators, the new thinkers, the DIY entertainers that are doing it all without the corporate machine shoving them down our throats.

They ARE out there. Artists, musicians, writers, Podcasters, builders, chefs, etc. Normal, passionate people that are out there doing their thing, because they can’t NOT do it. Regular folk, following their calling. Not for fame and fortune, but because it is a part of their very soul. Seek these people out, and kick the reality TV and the Billboard charts to the curb. Those people, and I use the term loosely, don’t care one iota about you or your life, why should you care about theirs? So you have something to talk about with your co-workers tomorrow?

I fear I’ve kinda got off track here… My point is, there are a lot of great people doing new, innovative, exciting things with their lives and that is what I wish for everybody. Sadly, a lot of folks are led around “by the nose”, never thinking for themselves or attempting to accomplish anything in their lives. That way leads to misery.

Everybody’s got their “something” (H/T to Nikka Costa for that line!). Everybody has their own dreams and aspirations. I just hope for you, that those dreams go beyond “being rich” or “being famous”… Those two “rewards” take an awful toll, not really worth the price of admission IMHO.

So think about it… What’s YOUR thing? What do YOU want to accomplish, to create? Now, with that “thing” in mind, go out and find yourself someone successful in that arena. THAT is who you should be looking up to, not the celebrity du jour.

And above all, believe in yourself. Nobody, not your parents, not your spouse or your partner, not your friends or colleagues truly KNOW what you’re capable of. I’m a firm believer in the idea that we’re all capable of doing whatever it is we need to do to make our lives better. But talk is cheap, the real value is in doing.

I realize this has almost nothing to do with the original essay that prompted this writing, but in the big scheme of things there are certainly parallels. That’s just the way this tired old brain works…a little acorn of an idea leads to something else entirely. Just something to think about.

Thanks for reading!

Monday memes…

I had a pretty quiet, uneventful weekend. My mind is realitively peaceful and my batteries are mostly recharged. In other words, I got nothin’ to blather on about.

Since it’s Monday I figure I’d share a few memes that gave me a good laugh. Best wishes for a painless week to all!

See y’all soon. Thanks for reading!

Ahh, youth!

I received this picture yesterday from one of my oldest and dearest friends…

I recognized the time and place immediately: 8th grade graduation night, Roger’s Middle School, June 1982.

On the left is Joel “Magic” Johnson, who in this pic was already a world renowned RC car racer (in 8th grade FFS!!), and would become a legend in the field.

On the right is Patrick, AKA Pablo, AKA Apple Pie Boy or APB for short. In summation, the most self-determined and authentic person I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. And on top of that, he’s just great at everything, whether it’s surfing or playing music, academic stuff…the guy just excels at life.

In the middle is yours truly, a 40 year younger Boring Old Man.

The three of us were inseparable back then. We didn’t have EVERYTHING in common, but there was so much overlap between the three of us, the few minor differences didn’t matter at all.

We came up together and went through a lot of “firsts” together, learning to drive, talking to girls, learning to be men… Joel’s parents had the very first VCR I ever saw in real life. Patrick’s father had the first PC I ever saw, back when you had to put a phone receiver on a docking station to connect to a network. Not the “internet”, but A network. Yeah, I’m old, kids…

Of course as high school came along, our paths started to drift a little… Joel’s career in the RC world took off like a rocket, while simultaneously getting suckered into playing football for the school team.

Pablo worked his ass off all through HS. Excellent grades (as if his mother would accept anything less!!) to get into college and the boy ALWAYS had a job. Always.

Myself, I would get eyeballs deep into music, forming bands and playing every house party and event that would let us, culminating in my first professional night club gig about a week before my 18th birthday, which was just a few days before (barely) graduating.

Our meandering paths would continue to cross over the decades and although sometimes there would be big gaps, whenever we’d reunite it was like no time had passed.

Patrick and I continue to get together from time to time to go for a surf or just hang out, but sadly it’s been a pretty darn long time since I’ve seen ol’ Joel. But since he’s the one that kicked this off by sending that pic out to Pablo, I think it’s high time I get off my butt and get in touch with him.

Hold on to your friends, people. I don’t mean farcebook friends, but REAL people that actually know you. Its difficult in modern life, but it’s important. The longer you wait, the harder it becomes so bite the bullet and dial the phone. Or send an email. Whatever. Personal relationships are precious and even if you’re lucky, you only get a few of them in life. Foster them, protect them, feed them.

‘Cuz before you know it, you’ll be 40 years older, wondering “what ever happened to…?” Your life will be richer if you don’t have to ask those questions, but already know the answer.

Thanks for reading!

Fence sitting.

Don’t get excited now, this isn’t a post about politics or vaccines or maniac warmongers. Well, I guess it could be, depending on how YOU relate to the message, but that isn’t my intention.

No, what is on my mind today is undecidedness and “shortages” or shall we just say the current state of commerce.

Our story begins with a guitar. A beautiful, black Gretsch semi-hollow, electric 6-string. Left handed, of course.

Me being a drummer primarily, and not really an adept player of stringed instruments, I really had no need of this guitar, it was more of a lifelong quest to own one like this. To be perfectly, 100% honest my dream is to own a left-handed Rickenbacker 360 in a jetglo finish, but spending $3k for an instrument that I’m only noodling around on would be insane. But after much research and comparison, I “settled” on the Gretsch as an acceptable alternative and had it on a “wishlist” with one of my favorite vendors.

About a year and a half has passed since I finalized my decision. I have no idea how many times I went back and looked at it, and told myself “not now, but soon!”. There was always something more important to spend money on, and I already have one guitar that I don’t spend enough time with, so it was easy to keep talking myself out of it and to keep waiting.

Finally, yesterday I decided “today is the day!”. I’d received an unexpected bonus and decided I’d take a little bit of it and treat myself to the guitar I’d been longing for.

I went to the vendor’s website, pulled up my wishlist and…the guitar isn’t there. Huh? I’ve looked at it every couple weeks for the last year and a half, where is it? I did a search and the same model came up, but not in black. I’m not here to judge, but honestly I cannot believe some of the colors they put on instruments these days! Anyhow, I proceed to check a couple other places online and find the guitar in the right color, but nobody has it in stock. So I go back to my preferred vendor and contact my rep there, who informs me the guitar has been discontinued. “You’ll have to hit the used market if you want one”, he tells me.

So now I hit the usual suspects of the online used gear market, trying to track down this guitar. No dice. Not a single one to be found.

So naturally I’m a little bummed out by this development. But luckily this was for a completely superfluous purchase. Something I did not need whatsoever, and something that will not effect my life in any way at all by not having it other than some mild disappointment.

Yes, you could say I got lucky. But what if the “wishlist” item WAS something critical? What have you been putting off, waiting for the “right time” to purchase? Maybe your oven crapped out…maybe your car tires are bald…maybe those solar panels you want to help yourself be a little more self reliant. Whatever it is, if you have the means, get it NOW. We’re in unprecedented and unpredictable times. That common thing that’s always been there may not be there tomorrow. I went through a similar situation with a rifle a few years ago…waiting and waiting for the “right deal”, then the Plague hit, and that particular rifle is STILL unavailable more than 2 years later. You just never know.

I realize that right now with runaway inflation causing astronomical food and fuel prices, it’s hard to think about spending anything beyond what is absolutely necessary, but keep in mind that same inflation is decreasing the purchasing power of the dollars you possess every single day you hold on to them. For example, last week we had a blowout, requiring a replacement tire. The destroyed tire was a year old, almost to the day. That one cost me $250, the replacement last week was $309. For the exact same tire, from the same vendor. That’s a big increase in a single year. Keep that in mind when you’re saving for rainy day. It might make sense to buy your umbrella NOW, and hold onto it, rather than waiting for the storm only to find out umbrellas are now 3x the cost or simply unavailable at any price.

I’ve seen all kinds of shortages and delays since the Plague hit . Of course the infamous toilet paper shortage of 2020, but things like SPAM (the food, not the email irritants) were unavailable for months. Air filters for the furnace were unobtainable for months. N95 masks and latex gloves. Now we’re hearing tales of major shortages of wheat this year and another round of bird flu, on top of last year’s swine flu killing off livestock, adding to meat supply shortages. I regularly purchase from the LDS Cannery for long term storage foods and even they are sold out of things like flour, wheat kernels, pasta…

These kind of things don’t happen overnight, but they don’t “go back to normal” overnight either. Plan accordingly. If there is something you NEED, and you can (legally) get your hands on it now, do not hesitate.

With the way things are heating up, both here and internationally, and with the gaggle of dingbats at the controls, none of us have any idea what’s around the next corner. Do what you can NOW to make your future a little more secure.

Just my two cents…

Thanks for reading!

As the hamster wheel turns…

Back at work today. Another “typical” Monday, as if such a thing truly exists. I just cannot seem to get in the swing of things today, and the day is half over already.

It’s not because I had a little too much party in my weekend, it’s not a daylight savings glitch. Nothing bad has happened here today, in fact it’s been pretty smooth, all things considered. I think it’s simply a case of burnout.

I’ve been working in senior living facilities for 15 years now. This is my 3rd CCRC (Continuing Care Retirement Community) in that time, and I think I’ve just had enough.

I fell ass-backward into this industry, due to a really aggressive recruiter that simply would not take no for an answer, and at the time it seemed like a good opportunity. And it was. That first community was great. Ownership was good, the residents for the most part were nice, I had an AMAZING crew and the icing on top was that the facility was only 0.6 miles from home, so I was able to walk to work for 6 years, and it was fantastic. It was another recruiting experience that got me to jump ship to a new facility. Within a week I knew beyond all reasonable doubt that I’d made a HUGE mistake changing jobs, but I was determined to make the best out of it and I stuck it out for 5 long, grueling years at the most repulsive, toxic workplace I’ve ever encountered. It wasn’t all bad, I did learn some extremely valuable lessons working there, I made a couple friends and I made some excellent contacts there, but the overall experience was beyond negative. When I got to my literal breaking point, that very same day I got a notification about an opening for my exact job at a place revered amongst senior care facilities. The absolute Pinnacle of the industry. And I got the gig!

It took quite a while to become dissallusioned with the new place. After a few months I felt, not quite “tricked”, but certainly the victim of lies-of-ommission. I was lead to believe this place was a fine-tuned machine, with a place for everything and everything in its place. Well, that turned out to be about 20% true. The OTHER 80% was up to me to figure out and put in place.

Now here I am, just having had my four year anniversary last month, and I feel I have completely, utterly lost my taste for the work on pretty much every level.

Don’t get me wrong. This is not simply a case of being ungrateful. This job has been pretty much the ONLY time in my entire adult life that I’ve been financially “secure”. I do have some really nice, talented people working for me and I’ve been able to promote some really deserving staff into higher levels, which is rewarding in its own way. I’ve learned a lot here, and the experience isn’t without some positive moments.

The problem is I really just don’t care anymore. I’ve got a staggering, debilitating case of indifference, and it’s making it hard to function effectively.

I believe this element is one of my DNA building blocks

Changing jobs is a stressful situation, not to mention the whole “interview process”. I’m not in any hurry to jump into that can of worms. But I’ve got another 2 decades to go before “retirement”, which in my case will likely just simply be dropping dead, as the entirety of my *wealth, and thus retirement evaporated in the DotCom crash many years ago, never to be restored.

The thing is, I don’t have any sort of objection to working. With the exception of a prolonged stretch of unemployment during the same DotCom crash era mentioned above, I’ve been holding down jobs since I was 14. Even younger if you count the newspaper delivery routes I did as a kid.

When I worked as a tradesman, you’d have moments where you could stand back and say “yeah, I BUILT THAT!”, or “I FIXED THAT”, or what have you. There were moments of pride, of feeling accomplished. Something untangible… the feeling of turning raw materials into a finished, useful product, made you feel GOOD. Being productive is good for you mentally. Solving “real world” problems that are literally sitting on the bench right in front of you gives you that dopamine rush everyone is trying to glean from FB and IG…

But now? Now my days consist of 70+ emails a day, at least dozen phone calls a day, countless meetings and conversations about everything and nothing simultaneously. It’s exhausting, and yet at the end of the day, on MOST days, I find myself wondering “what did I do today?”. Oh, I assigned, I delegated, I sorted out, I circled back…I do all sorts of stuff, all day long. But really, I don’t feel like I’m accomplishing anything, just spinning my wheels, keeping the wheels of this places from coming off.

I don’t think this is what life is supposed to be like. As a middle-aged, “CIS-gendered” paleface without a college degree, I don’t have a lot of options open to me. I just simply cannot continue to do this for another 20 years. I still don’t know what I want to do when I grow up, but it sure ain’t this!

Can one actually DIE from BOREDOM? Asking for a friend…

Thanks for reading!

Things I tell myself…

As I sit on the side of the highway, on a Friday night, waiting for a tow truck…

Let’s hope he’s right!

We have some fun plans for the weekend and I’m determined not to let this derail the good times ahead.

Stay safe out there and if you’re having a rough day/night/ week/whatever… keep your chin up and tell yourself things will only get better!

An attitude adjustment

The Mrs. and I were in the car the other day when I made a rather unkind statement regarding the incompetence of the driver in front of me, who was at the time driving between 15-20 mph BELOW the limit on the highway.

Before I continue, I will say I am by no means a fast or aggressive driver. I pretty much stick to the right lane and I haven’t had a traffic infraction of any sort since maybe 1992… I could be off slightly, but not by much. My point being, I am generally calm and mellow behind the wheel. Except in San Francisco- calm and mellow will get you killed in that city, but I digress…

Anyhow, the Mrs. says to me; “you shouldn’t grouse so much”.

For the vocabulary impaired:

grouse verb

groused; grousing

Definition of grouse (Entry 2 of 3)

intransitive verb

: COMPLAIN, GRUMBLEgroused about the higher prices

Anyhow, I said, “yeah you’re right. I just get frustrated by nincompoops.” And she encouraged me to chill out and not let it get to me.

Ten minutes later I’m forced to react to another nincompoop that decided to change into my lane, without looking or signaling, and in that nanosecond that I was about to have another outburst, I remembered my wife’s words and all I said, calm as could be, was “Look, this is me not grousing.”

We had a good chuckle over it and a good conversation followed about, basically, not letting the bastards get ya down.

That’s a hard thing to do. Especially nowadays. It seems at every turn, somebody is trying to ruin your day. Maybe it’s your boss, maybe it’s a customer. Could be your mate, or your parent, or your kids. More often than not, a total stranger.

For me at least, a lot of my aggravation comes from other’s inconsiderate behavior. Whether it’s getting cut off in traffic or some dingbat blocking the entire grocery aisle with their cart while they compare labels. Maybe your neighbors play the TV too loud, or someone lets their Harely idle for half an hour, waking the neighborhood and the dead. It’s usually something small. Some irritating impediment. But when you add up 5, 10, 20 of those little irritations in a day, suddenly you find yourself wishing you had a nice, heavy mallet in your hand to help let your feelings be known to the irritant.

But that random comment from the Mrs. was a good reminder for me. Irritation is in your head, and you DO have control over how you react. You just need to use that control, and not let the irritants win. Simple, right?

Nobody wants to be “that guy” that bitches and moans about everything, or worse gets completely bent outta shape over every little slight. I can’t stand people like that, and they are everywhere. You don’t want to be in that club, it’s a miserable place to hang out.

I don’t really believe everyone is out to ruin everybody else’s day. Most of them are just too stupid and/or ill mannered to know any better. That doesn’t mean their behavior is OK, it just means you don’t have to let it bring you down.

Just something to think about the next time somebody pushes your buttons. Or drives 47mph in front of you on the highway…

Thanks for reading!